i am a little calm.
what had happened, been told to my beloved hubby.
he wasn't even shocked. well, maybe he was but he didn't show it. he was so relaxed. but truly, i don't want him to judge anybody. i don't want him to speculate on anything. i asked him to be as neutral as he can be. no sides. and he did.
the calming hug and the loving kisses he gave on my head, really helped. i cried in his arms. silently. no matter what people say about him; not handsome, not this and that, just a govt servant, just a nobody or what so ever, i still love him. he's the only whose listening and whose there comforting me when i was down and hurt. he's the closest one to me. if anybody claims that they know me well, it will be nobody else, than him (who knows me the best that i can tell).
i feel better, calmer. more relaxed.
my heart still ache, though.