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Wednesday, April 16, 2008

me..me..and me. (beware of 18sx contents)

well..it's been 3 days now. vomiting whatever i ate. just don't feel that good inside my tummy. goodness. only one thing in my mind but decided not to get panic just by thinking of it. lucky guess? heh..think hard.

today i ate cheesy foccasia for lunch. drank warm water with lite lime extract to eliminate my sense of vomiting and now, while blogging, eating a butter sandwich. bukan nak jaga badan or dieting but just tired of vomiting again and again.

when i told my situation to my good friend ninie (who's currently residing in Dubai; following her hubby) she was furiously cursing me on and on with thought that i must be pregnant. ha ha..gila ninie nih..sesuka jek sumpah seranah aku. heks!!

even if i'm pregnant (again!?) i'll be glad. and yes, that's the thought that i'm trying to avoid. tired of raising the three musketeers isn't over yet adding another one? adoii.. kalau dah rezeki, tak apalah.. blame my hubby for not using protection!! ha ha.. but honestly, deep down my heart, there are mixed feelings about getting pregnant again. glad and happy for having another baby but at the same time feeling tired for i have to raise them all by my own. ye laa..hubby keje, kan. house chores, cooking, bathing the children, changing diapers etc..penat beb. i had my everyday morning shower around 12 noon beb. morning hapa cenggitu, kan? then lepas maghrib baru nak mandi petang plak. got to settle the kids and the house dloo. my laundry? my goodness!! 2 hari sekali yet still tak cukup ampaian. muahahhahaa. tu belum kira yang belum dilipat. Ya Allah..kuatkanlah hambaMu ini. Tangga rumah? takleh mop, tak lut. kena lap beb. macam orang jepun kemas rumah. pergghhh..seminggu sekali lap pun habuknya, astaghfirullah..nak hire weekly assistant..tak mampu plak. kot setakat seploh doploh hinggit untuk simple chores, kalau ada yang ndak..boleh le diusahakan. tak menang tangan aku nih weii.. anak2 dgn kerenah mereka..dok hingaq sana sini. sat main tang ni, tinggal..pi tang sana plak bongkar ntah apa lagi..pstuh tinggal. nak putus urat tekak memekik..but then, anak2. bukan paham sangat pon dgn situasi kita. tak apa..soon they will understand. terima dgn redha dan sabar..upahNya sangat lumayan. hehehehe...but, the thought of having another baby ni pon quite disturbing my hubby, for sure he will have to work a little more harder to ensure the wellness of the family. banyak mulut nak suap. poor him too. sapa tak sayang suami weii...i cant see him coming back from work looking like some indons labour. by writing this alone i'm feeling sad. hardly controlling my tears. i love him, of course. kesian tgk dia balik keje lewat hari2. dah habis shift di UiTM berkejar pula ke Studio Anggerik. my dad said, nak senang in the future kena susah2 dulu in the present. I know. Been thru that situation.

When i was only 7..dad started a business. habis shift malam dekat ISF Port Klang, balik around 7.30a.m ( aku selalu pi sekolah lambat beb, kena tunggu ayah balik dulu..kalau tak sapa nak antar?), sent me to school, then sleep for about 2 hrs and mula buat biznes dia, as an F class contractor. as a beginner, dialah kuli dialah boss. kena tipu? bayaran sangkut? even aku kecik lagi, i know all the story.

nak diuji lagi, my dad encountered a thrilling experience. I GOT KNOCKED DOWN BY A LORRY! he was just got back from work (ISF), I just got back from mengaji quran and told to buy a loaf of bread and a bottle of soy sauce (kicap laa). when about to cross the road (not heading home but to the playground instead) a 1 tonne lorry reversed, and couldnt see tiny me ( ha ha) and u can tell what's next. got hit with another friend of mine, Ayu. there were four of us, Along (ayu's sis), ayu, yan and me. Along and yan crossed earlier, they were safe! but me and ayu got hit. ayu's ok. just few bruises here and there. but me? i got stuck under the lorry. laid on my back, with my knee on my face. imagining? good..keep it on. hehehe..got dizzy..was between consciousness and next thing i remember, the driver brought me to the nearest clinic (Klinik Tg. Amir, Sect. 16, Shah Alam- now azim's(my hubby's friend) in law's restaurant). there he asked me to walk on my own inside the clinic and i said "mana boleh, sakit la". then i saw a glimpse of my dad, just arrived with his motor buruk. turned out along told him bout the accident, handed him the flatten bread and broken soy sauce bottle; shaking heavily with tears. dad grabbed me from the driver and carried me in. heard Tg. Amir scolded the lorry driver "apsal langgar budak kecik? kenapa bawak sini? terus la hantar hospital!! gila ke?!" I was just smiling weakly.
when the nurse was done cleaning my cuts and wound, my dad rushed me to the hospital (HBTAR, of course) with the lorry. the driver was quiet all the way long. my dad? babbling like hell to him. I remember everything. dad said "kalau aku tau kau nak langgar anak aku, aku bunuh kau awal2!" luckily he didn't know earlier, kan? he patted my cheek, kissed my forehead, talked non stop, just to kept me awake. upon ariving at the Hospital, stretcher's awaited, rushed to O.R. Got stripped down (they tore my red baju kurung as it has already torn), the nurse was asking me my name, age and so on..the light's on and while thinking hardly the answer to the simple questions asked i was 'gone'. good trick aa... woke up on the stretcher on the way to the ward. there i saw my mother, still in her work dress. spent a week at the hospital and 2 months recovery leave. ha ha..cuti sekolah pon..hujung tahun, tak merasa la ponteng. keh keh keh..

poor my dad and mum eh? in order to upgrade the family living quality, had to face so many turbulance and consequences. thinking of the problems they had to deal with and the current ones disturbing my hubby and me, I can still be thankful. the best is yet to come. we have to be prepared.

by reading this, please dont assume that i'm pregnant again. blom check & takut nak check. and please support us mentally. we need it badly.

till later....... ;)


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